Chicken Drama And A Recipe

NOTE: No chickens were harmed in the making of this blog post.

So it's Saturday night and I was minding my own business...
Yes, it's gonna be that kinda story.
I have spent my day off whipping up vegan treats and catching up with friends via social media.  #BestDayEver!
One of the treats I made was a lovely bunch of Vegan Raw Fudge.  Recipe was so simple and quick that I should make weekly. But then I would be eating fudge weekly and well...maybe not a good idea either.

If you follow me on SC you saw my heavenly creation among my daily random snaps. 

Now I do make other things, they just don't look as pretty as the dessert, so I rarely post them. But tonight as I was cooking, and I was also talking to one of friends, he was teasing me about the fudge and we were private snapping back and forth....So I sent him this video of what I was cooking at the moment.  Please note dear reader, this was a private video but I was not naked, not everything that happens on SC is porn related.  BUT,  It did get me in serious trouble! 

I was cooking, and not paying attention to WTF I was doing and sent not to him, but to my stream... and the fall out was almost immediate! 
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"WTF! Is that Chicken?!"
"IS THAT CHICKEN?!"
"How can you cook chicken!"
"That's gross chicken!" 
"I thought you were a vegan!" 

And more of that....

My phone was on fire! I expected the Vegan cops to raide my house any second!

Okay in my mind that's clearly not chicken. 
Isn't this chicken????

Chicken

I was clearly not cooking THAT!
What I was frying (How dare I right? But I was using orgainic Olive Oil, I actually linked it below the recipe for your insepction) was clearly NOT chicken, it was TOFU, you know, that thing every vegan is supposed to eat? I rarely eat it, but thought I wanted to try this receipe for a change of pace. #GoMe and didn't that work out well...

Here is the actual recipe for my Fried Tofu Nuggets:

Crispy Tofu Nuggets
Ingredients
    •    1 block extra-firm organic tofu (NOT CHICKEN)
    •    3 cloves garlic
    •    2 tablespoons tomato paste or ketchup
    •    1 tablespoon dijon mustard
    •    1 tablespoon maple syrup
    •    2 tablespoon water
    •    1/4 teaspoon black pepper
    •    3/4 cup of oat flour (I made my own from whole oats - aka oatmeal)
    •    4 tablespoons olive oil (or enough to fry the tofu)
    •    A dash of Himalayan salt 
    •    A side of your favorite sauce for dipping

Instructions
    1    Drain the tofu, and cut into nugget sized pieces. NOTE: DO NOT USE CHICKEN
    2    Once cut, lay the tofu pieces on a clean dishtowel, and then wrap them up in the towel. Put a cutting board on top, and balance something heavy, such as a few cans on top of that. This is how you press the tofu to help release excess water. Let the tofu press for 10 to 30 minutes, the longer you press it, the drier and more firm the it will be. Note: It will not turn into chicken.
    3    When you are ready to make your tofu, mince the garlic cloves and add them to a large flat bowl that is big enough to fit your nuggets.
    4    Add the remaining sauce ingredients to the garlic bowl: the tomato paste/ketchup, dijon mustard, maple syrup, water, and pepper,  whisk together.
    5    In a separate dish that is also big enough to fit the tofu, add the oat flour.
    6    Dip the tofu  in the tomato mixture, and use a spoon or fork to help spread a thick layer of the sauce on the tofu. Now dip the sauced tofu into the oat flour and use your hand to help pat the flour onto the tofu. Repeat with remaining tofu pieces. 
    7    Heat the oil in a frying pan over medium heat. When hot, carefully fry the tofu pieces until they are golden brown on both sides, and heated through. About 3 to 6 minutes per side. The breading can be a little fragile and falls off easily, be gentle when handling the tofu. (Still not chicken)
    8    Serve with sticky rice and a side of your favorite dipping sauce.
Serves two - three people.
 It is actually very, very good! 
I found this basic recipe on line and added my own twists to it. But clearly NOT chicken.
Here are the oats I ground up in my food processor and the tofu I used...

And the other ingredients...See no chicken! 

Those are affiliate links, if you want to buy straight from them, I do get a few pennies from the sale. It does not affect your cost at all and helps to keep me in tofu and maple syrup. I'm hoping to save enough money to take Snap Chat lessons so that I never make this mistake again. 

Have a good weekend and can I call you for bail money if the Vegan cops don't believe me? We ate all the evidence.

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